There sure are a lot of smart people here. Makes me wonder how I slipped through the cracks.

At one time, you loved her...that's why you were married. I think that, extreme situations aside, some part of those feelings remain after the divide. As we get older, some of us mature more and are able to look back at situations differently than we saw them at the time. As confusing as it was, I'm glad you stumbled upon something that refreshed a good experience you had in your past.

__________________
Though I am different from you,
We were born involved in one another.

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

Complete surrender should not just come at moments in which one faces overwhelming odds, but in the calm when it seems one is personally in complete control of one's life.